General information about this weeks' plan can be found here. The theme for this week is: "A Child In Focus".

This week, we are continuing to think about your personal space, but extending the scope a little...

Group Three is for people who want to prioritise time management, de-cluttering their lives, etc.

Please pick a group for yourself and stick with it for two months. Once you decide which group you belong to, don't attempt to follow advice for other groups at the same time, as you will have too much to do. If you are not sure which group you should join, start with the lower numbers as they include introductions to the concepts of later groups.

You may sometimes think that you could have achieved more in one week, but don't assume this means that the programme isn't going at your pace. If you find you have achieved everything I mentioned for a particular week, find a way of adapting the same theme somewhere else in your home. We have to go slowly, because you have other things going on in your life and if you have a few days where you feel overwhelmed, you may well decide to ditch the de-clutter programme first. This is why we are going to take it slow.

Also, the key to continued success is to get into the habit of doing it, not to have a de-cluttering frenzy several times a year!

We often consider our children as a group, regarding their individual needs only as an afterthought. This is the sign of a busy parent who needs to find some more time. Using the "little by little" approach, we have started to make your busy life more simple by breaking it down into a series of individual tasks, which you deal with one at a time. Now, we are going to take a whole week to think about the needs of just one of your children.

If you have more than one child, don't think too deeply about which one you will focus on for the purpose of this week's Plan. It could be as simple as to choose the next child to walk into the room.

Take a few minutes to make a list of your child's hopes and dreams. If s/he is not yet old enough to tell you, imagine what they might be, based on what you know about your child's personality, and his/her 'likes' and 'dislikes'. Rather than having a general feeling of wanting to spend more 'quality time' with this child, the list you have made will serve as a more tangible form of motivation, helping you to move forward and remind yourself of distinct reasons why you have to remain focused, and to make positive things happen for your family.

This week's Plan is not designed to tell you how to spend quality time with your child, as this is obviously something you will do when the moment arises. My aim is to help you reach that state of 'readiness' when quality time becomes more forthcoming and abundant. Yes, we are back to time management once again.

Take your calendar down from the wall and, for each month of the year, insert at least one reminder (or, better still, a firm appointment) associated with the child. Sometimes, it might be something mundane such as a dental appointment, in which case you might as well book a family appointment for the sake of efficiency, but remember the focus is on the one child so at other times it might be a trip to do something the child is interested in, or a shopping trip to buy a new coat. Underline the appointments that should not be changed (perhaps you will decide that the dentist may have problems fitting you in at an alternative time, or maybe you feel that quality time feeding the ducks on the first Monday of every month is something too important to move).

As you add other appointments to the calendar over the course of the year, you will have dates associated with the child which you might want to avoid clashing with, or else ensure that you reschedule should a clash occur.

The idea of the Group 3 Plans is to take away some of your worries so that you can pay more attention to enjoying your life, thus giving you more energy to efficiently cope with problems as they arise. By focusing on the needs of your children on an individual basis, as opposed to making plans for them as a group, you are able to ensure:

• all the practical things are scheduled to happen as they become due;


• time is put aside for quality time; and


• new appointments are booked around the existing schedule, or else you have the prompt to organise an alternative date for your other plans.

Ideally, spend the whole week just looking out for what your child wants out of life and to come up with ideas of things your child can do with you, with siblings, etc. If you have a lot of time, though, repeat this exercise for each of your other children. You might notice that your calendar becomes very busy indeed, but remember that these things were likely to happen anyway - now you have them written down instead of holding them in your head with a chance you might forget to make a few of them happen on time (if at all). In a previous week, we thought about saying no to people who make unreasonable demands on us, and this calendar will serve as a reminder that you should always say you will check your schedule before you commit your time to anyone or any project. If you are asked to do something during a busy month, either reschedule what you are doing, say no, or else realise that you are going to have to work harder that month in order to do all you want to. Working harder is reasonable, so long as you also book a rest for yourself beforehand and afterwards!

Finally, spare a few minutes to sit down with your partner and discuss what you would both like to add to the calendar for yourselves individually and also together as a couple.

Due to popular demand(!), there will eventually be a children's de-cluttering section on Spiritsense.

As always, I welcome your feedback because it helps me to come up with new ideas and solutions for you.

Good luck everyone, and DO try this at home!

Wendy.